When we say we love someone and wish to live our lives with someone, we make huge promises and commitments. But when it comes to little things in life, we don't accept the person the way they are, not realizing that you're not getting married to a new born child but to a mature individual who has his own surrounding, his own way of living. You can't change a person’s habits that have been part of him for the last 20- 25- 27 years. So it's nice when a change is made from within, you become a better person, a better human. Positive changes are great. That effort is fair. But things like, 'you must comb your hair like this and not like that, I like you in open hair, and short hair', these are materialistic and outer things. Another very common example is turning into a vegetarian for your partner.
God has made a few things in a certain way. The core values of a person are unchangeable. I have known people who are typical Bollywood music lovers who end up falling in love with English music fans. 5 years later you meet them and they are talking shit about the same Bollywood music they have been brought up listening to. Loyalties changed..!! Today, giving company to enjoy each other’s choices is a 'can do', but changing your own choices is a definite 'no can do'. Why does one person change his/her taste buds to accommodate another's taste buds? Why is it necessary to have only one dish between two people? If one likes Chinese the other prefers Indian, there are ample restaurants that serve both. Share the joy of a meal together not the plate. Adults today say to each other when in love, 'I will change for you'. But changes are very temporary.
The 'me' in the relationship gets lost. Marriages fall, because initially I give you 3 slices of bread when I knew 1 would fill your hunger enough. Suddenly I give you just 1. What happens to the 2 slices? Those 2 slices come out in the form of irritation, frustration and fights. Don't let those 2 unwanted slices of bread be the reason for a fall in a beautiful journey you have shared all this while. When in the dating phase you do everything to make her happy forgetting the realistic and practical element that you're now princess, baby, darling, sweetie is at some point of time in life going to have a hard time where she may have to cry. It's wrong to commit to her that 'baby I won't let a tear dwell in your eye ever'. There is no harm when a girl cries tomorrow. When you are happy, that’s all you care for. So why is being sad made such a big deal of. Accept any situation gracefully. Face your troubles with the same 'Thank you God' spirit, like you do with happiness. It’s only making you a stronger individual. If you want a happy ending, do what you can die doing.
Science of life says exactly that, give that much love that you can sustain for the rest of your life. Make your loved one used to what you are from day one. Let there be acceptance. Don't force a relationship to work if it steals your individuality. On a closing note, very rightly said, if you can't be true to whom you are, you can't be true to the people you choose to live with.
